"I knew you"

To the girl who will never know me:


                                                         I knew You

I had always known you. Yet you never knew me



I've known your name and who you were, much longer then those who claim to be your "Besties"...

I knew you before you ever had your first drink, before you ever knew the real meaning of "how to party"

Before you ever learned how to laugh, before you ever joined the those cheerleaders preps

I knew you before the contacts, before you ever wore make up, before you enjoyed tanning

I knew you way before you looked at me and said "Aren't you that guy who went out with that one girl"...Yes I knew you well then


I've known of you before you were ever recognized as a person, before you were in your intellect world…(which even now I still secretly see you hiding it)


I knew you when we were in 7th grade, when we had science class together

Oh I still knew you even when you were in your little box of anti-social, before you ever decided to stand up straight... Yes I knew you

I knew you when you didn't exist

I knew you when you were quiet and isolated

I knew you when you were invisible to everyone’s eyes

I even knew you when you had that disgusting thing of a boyfriend named "Ben" which he was one disturbing child (why the hell did you go out with him in the first place?)

I knew you when no one dare came near you because they thought you were strange

I knew you when books became your only hobby

...I knew you when you didn't even know yourself.



And here I am today, still as distance as before, still observing our paths that we've taken. Yet I still wished that our worlds had collide earlier, since they never have. (maybe things would of turned out great.)
We were only two rings scraping against each other, we were worlds touching but never colliding or interconnecting. But I have always watched from a distance, watched how we grew up.

I always had thought even before the world had ever known of you, even before you had a name, I had always thought...you were kind of cute
I really did like you and had a major crush on you in 7thgrade.
Whether in PE or in our science classes, I really did like you and I wanted to know more of who you were.


I knew you when our 8th grade began, I remembered that day you came in:
no glasses
walking upright
hair neaten up
cheeks plumped up
Make up on
you were so beautiful and caught the eyes of many but at the same time I felt sad.


After awhile you were brought to life. People saw who you were, they asked silly questions as though they never knew you...but I did.
And as our worlds moved farther away, we never had the chance to know each other. And just like you were invisible in 6 and 7th grade, neither did I exist to you at all in 8th and 9th grade.
And even now I'm still a ghost. When you emerged out of your path you became someone else just like I have came out as a different person.
Now at this hour of who I see you, I wonder if I know who this person is that you have become.
I'm not sure if I know you so much anymore.

My former crush, even before you ever existed, we never had once collided, and I doubt we ever will.



                                                  Sincerely your old, longtime,  invisible friend.

 
 
((I wrote this March 21st, 2009. But revisioned it today))