Why did you have to stay behind? Why is it that we weren't worth coming after? You were warned by mom...but you laughed...because you were a coward. So I remained introverted for so many years..spoke not a word to anyone. Remained separated from the closeness of society. I was thrown to the back of the room, and naturally became an observer of all the people. I saw with my eyes how foolish they were and walked futher back to avoid their iniquity.
Today I seem to be no different then when I first left you..What if you had came? Maybe things could be better...maybe it would of been hell, but I at least I would find a sense of identity in you! Maybe I would of seen the world better, maybe I would have learned so much more as a teacher to your own son! but that never happened. Now I have to create my own idenetity, maybe a new name. But if you really want to know about me, we're all doing great.
We are living an American dream thanks to mom.I have my own bedroom, I am so blessed. I love my family so much, mom did so much for us. I'm not sure if I will ever know you well, not sure if I will fully understand myself likewise....we hardly can speak to each other in a correct language for goodness sake.
You do not deserve a son's love according to logic. But emotionally I can't help myself but to call you father. If you want to do something for me then do this one thing. To stay alive until I reach the age of 25. So you can see that I have outlived you, that I have surpassed you multiple times. So maybe when I do see you again, I can say "I forgive you father. The curse is broken" and maybe for once I could hear the sweet words of , such an American cliche "I'm proud of you, son". Because when I become a father, I will be more of a father to my son then you ever were to me.
But this is just a letter, a letter that will not make it to you in fathers day...
Sincerely, your broken son
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