When I fall down

 I wrote this way long ago when I was a sophmore at chamberlain highschool. It was read on stage for our annual Poetry contest. I was nervous and must say it was perhaps the most bible thumper peice I have ever done. But in truth it was greatly inspired by God. And at my most hardest time I had realized the truth about Jesus...

"When I Fall Down"


When I fall I lost it all

Pain that I'm feeling

Pain that I'm put into shame



When I fall I hit the floor

Face to the pavement

Face the facts that I've lost



Feeling so helpless

Feeling so tired

Feeling so left out

That no one is going to help me up



Giving in slowly

Falling in faster

Such a disaster has slowly took my life



No one besides me

Everyone gone

Dying so slowly how could this happen


Who could of knew I would be laid out to waste

If only they knew, in this lost and lonely place

Where I had laid my face to weep



No one dares pick me up

But walked away


From me which burdens laid me down

But left astray

No one cares of leaving me this way

No one cares, who cares, who will, what face





Puddles of tears I've wept

People I cared had left

No one around me

I will never be found here

Lost in anxiety weeping and crying that I have fallen



I never noticed at that time and place

There was a hand with a hole in its palm

Reaching over me wanting me to grab hold

Then I heard a gentle voice say

"Arise I've heard your cries"



In such a surprise

Jesus Stood next to me before my eyes

Placing his nailed scar hand for me to grab

I then wept with joy and teared filled eyes

He was always by my side

Then he told me "I will niether leave you, nor forsake you"



And there was a time that he had faced the pain

When he was in Calvary

He had carried a cross

A cross of the burdens and sins of mankind

In which he suffered to release us from pain

I stood there with teared filled eyes

When I fall He always picks me up



Jesus my Savior

Jesus my creator

Never had left me

And never forsake me



Suffered our burdens

Sufered our pain times

Never had left

Stood over besides me and wept with me in pain times



He knows our needs

He knows our darkest paths



I will never be lonely

Never again to say it

Christ will be there when I fall



Never be lonely again

Never be burdened again

He never forgot me and never turned away from me



Always besides me with a hole in His palm

Reaching over for me to grab



My Redeemer, My Savior, My Lord, My Christ



Promises I will send to you

Promises of your Holiness

I will always worship you

I will never turn away from you

I will never walk away from you

Always in my mind



You are all that matter, My master, my greatest life



I will always love you, always praise you

You can turn the worst day

Into the greatest day



I love you Lord



And if I must I would die for your name

Just so I can my persecuters, how much I love you

And show them how far Christian love really goes



Lord when I'm in my darkest days

When they turn away, feeling so tired, feeling so disgraceful

When I hit the floor, Lord

I will weep my cry and weep my eyes out

But not because of them, Lord

But because of you

At the end of it all it will be you and me

Always besides me, Never forgotten me

My Redeemer, My savior

The hand that will always pick me up

When I fall down He will always pick me up

by Marco Antonio Oviedo
written October of 2006

The Tragedy of the Lover

I wrote this many months ago in December of 2008, thought it would be nice to share


The Tragedy of the Lover

My eyes they interlock
Sweet and sweet meoldies I hear
And grasping hold of that, that of which I want
But I know the truth and I am sad
I know the Truth but yet I want it so bad
Those lips that I've nevered kiss
Oh how right it would be
But how misfortunate it will end

I love her with a passionate heart
I in desparate hunger, heart hungry for that love
See I can be your Prince Charming
I have already rescued you from many fires
I have challenged the dragons
And still I seek to kill them

But you do not see
You do not hear
You have not understood
What is burried in my heart
When I say I want you.

I may be perfect for you
But I wonder if thats still going to make it true
Will my firey passion be too hot and burn you
Or will the pain of me being struck be too cold
To leave you standing as a brick of ice
My secretly beloved I have never fully gotten you

We've touched....just slightly
Perhaps the first of my loves
That I have ever touched oh so ever passionately
But I've never felt your touch
I have never felt your heart
I have never read poetry truly intended for me
But yet you speak words that directs all aim to me
The guy your looking for, Its me
But you never meant it to be for me
I am your nothingless, nothing more


Now my hearts on fire as I read your words
It burns in me and my gentleness fades
Because theres a compromise in me
If I should?

But my eyes lashes out
My skin becomes of thick scales and leathery
My mouth breathes out fire ready to consume
My prickly sharp teeth ready to devour
And my heart has not melted
No!! It has become harden thick iced

I am now the enraged dragon greatly in pain
That I will never be your Prince Charming
You will never see me like you see him
See you have chosen the wrong person to be your Prince
Hes corrupt, hes underserving, hes after something else...his kingdom
Hes never going to take you as his Queen but as a servant
He will never love you as I have
He will never hold you close as I have
I love you but yet your letting me die?

Your corrupt Prince Charming is ready to kill me
With a sword poisioned by his filth
With armor stained from innocent blood
Wearing his helmet covering up his damnation
And with a smirk in his face knowing that hes killing the only person that knows
Who he really is.

But before I die, before our great battle, before he sinks blade into me
Or before I escape in flight not to return again
I just want to speak these last words, my prophesy, my predictions
"By the time you discover your biggest mistake, its going to be too late,
you will look and look but its your unseen treasure will be gone "

We fought, fought we rage, I wanted to stop him but he wanted the glory
I'm the victim but everyone believes I am the suspect
I only wanted to protect her I only want to demostrate more of how much I loved her
But she has eyes for someone else
She will throw me away and has done so before
But I love her and we fight and fight to prove so
She will never realized just how much I cared
And what she wants to keep is someone less loyal then me

As I begin feeling the pressure of defeat
As I feel the poision sinking into my blood
Breaking me, slowing me down
I become tired and weary, my heart does not melt
No Its still cold but now hurt
I loved her

As I fly away weary of knowin I stand no chance
I realize shes not worth it, shes too blind
And so I fly to somewhere looking for someone to see me
As thier Prince Charming and not the Dragon


While the Prince glorifies in his victory
I have gained victory in accepting the defeat
But now miles away, flying in the stars
Looking to place myself in a higher position while th earth rots

But there she stands speaking the words..
She had once felt breathless at the corrupt Prince because she thought she loved him
But now shes breathless for another reason
"He'll be mine" she says
But in truth shes breathless because she has discovered the truth
Shes traded her most beloved friend, her great companion
that had stood by and loved her
Who had done all for her just because he cared
Who treated her as a queen while having the heart of a servant
He loved her, she made him into the dragon but still he continued to of loved her
He traded her loving friend for a corrupted Prince

And for the rest of her life she will live with the corrupt prince
The rest of her life she will be full of burdens knowing that shes left her true love go away
Because she was too stupid to realize that her true love was next to her all along
Shes going to live her life full of tears, her man who will never feel love
No matter what she does for him or how much she loves the Prince
He will never love her, and she will soon understand how the dragon felt

Hes gone the dragon is gone, and she can only see him every few nights in the night sky
The dragon is so high up that even the stars have made an image of him
for the world to see....but he no longer loves her

by Marco Antonio de Oviedo
written December of 2008

Rewarding experience of a service clerk

I've been working for a few months as a service clerk (or bagger boy). I can say honestly love it. Just like thier statement it is in fact a rewarding job but just as equally it can also be unrewarding. So I'm here to make a statement separating the two.

Its rewarding in that I get to work in a great enviroment; colorful store, well neatly maintained, etc.

Its unrewarding in that sometimes the work enviroment changes to a pushing carts in a parking lot in the afternoon while its 103 degrees outside. But at least I'm getting somewhat of a tan out of it.

Its rewarding in that I get to interact face to face with customers. While providing great customer care.

Its unrewarding that sometimes the face to face contact could be from customers who publicly hate you with a passion. But in a situation such as that, just smile brightly and say "Goodmorning!"

Its rewarding that once in awhile I get tipped by very persistant customers who feel like my labor was to be rewarded

Its unrewarding in that 40% of the time I can barely even get a thank you.

Its rewarding in that I get to see the friendly faces of smiling customers.

Its unrewarding in that I have to face the veiny red faced customers who are upset because the world apparently doesn't revolve around them.

Its rewarding in that I get benefits from working there. Such as vacation, medicare, discounts and more.

Its unrewarding in that I may not see some of those benefits until years later after working there.

Its rewarding in that I have great managers who know how to run the place and straighten it up.

Its unrewarding in that those managers also know how to make a man work....hard!

Its rewarding that my work days are not constantly in a routine. And that everyday is a different story

Its unrewarding in the sense that any plans made will be disrupted due to unpredicatable hours.

Its rewarding that I get to do some labor work and get somewhat of a good work out from it

Its unrewarding that I have to come home and take out the trash after just getting done taking the trash out for an entire supermarket

Its rewarding that I do not have to trim my hair short.

Its unrewarding that I often get mistaken for a girl because of lengthy hair.

Its rewarding that we get to work strongly as a team.

Its unrewarding that if that team is not presence it will mess up everything.

Its unrewarding that I have to put up with cutomers driving 40 mph in a parkinglot while I push carts.

in that I tend to question how many customers have full functioning brain cells

in that cleaning toilets becomes a mystery of "what were they thinking" Or a game of who can
actually make it in the bowl.

in that I have to put up with over stuffed trash cans that mostly consists of fastfoods leftovers.

in that I am now able to separate the sane from insane simply by looking at thier order.

in that working on holidays is a must esp if it involves gatherings, food, and celebrations all at
once. Which is pretty much all of them.

But overall its rewarding when you experience the end of your shift. Clock out, remove name tag, loosen shirt and head home. Its almost a taste of the American dream.

...but its unrewarding in that moment of peace staring at the wonderful urban night sky that you then realize-you have to be back at work in less then 7 hours. Life is simply beautiful in those moments.

Intro of the Murky ways

To everything in life there is a beginning...in this case to this new website and blog. I thought it was neat and its sort of something I do often, well that is blogging.


To describe myself I am kind hearted genuinely (meaning that most of my intentions in life is for the good of goodness) though I tend to do things in a not so good manner but the result is almost always good.


I love the truth, I pratically celebrate it every day. And as a result I am pretty hated if not strongly dislike by people for doing so. I mean I personally would rather take a swift brutal truth to the face then a bloody overworded and edumacated(lol) lie. Its just who I am.


I also tend to be brutal in telling the truth, meaning that I can be very cut throat in making statements that I belive are true.


I am very surreal in the things I do and the things that come to mind. Distorting something as simple as a scenery involving a tree into an all out war of woodland critters claiming land.
(I swear I am sane...I think) I don't do this to express rage or secretly inner frustation but to entertain myself. I'm not pyhchologically derranged or unstable I'm just creative in a really crude way.


I am a complicated man in that I often make 2+2 seem like a trigometry equation. I guess simple things annoy me even if its within my level of understanding. Or that I enjoy a challenge.


I aknowledge that my creator so whenever I make statements like "When I was created I was not built with..." it is therefore of statement of the monotheistic God whose Son saved us in taking the backslashes we deserved. And I really don't care about what people say about God. whether its his existance or Christ's divinity or any made up conspiracy that dare morphs what He is. I will say it only once, whether I am Christlike or Satanlike, I still will never deny God's existance or Christ being the Son of God. Because honestly He is more real to me then most people around me who are barely even real to themselves. Either way God has altered my life in how I see it. With new found hope in glory.


I'm not a fad follower. I think it stupid to follow trends that in no way reflect who one is but rather distort it into something society currently wants.


I was a nice guy but I think I demoted myself into being just a "good guy" which is personally good for me because I get to further expand in expressing myself. And on the plus I can avoid being a girl's bestfriend.


I love to look at the positive outlook on life. Sad and whiney people tend to annoy me esp if its a constant thing. On the personal note some may say that my literature is dark and painful but that is not what I am trying to aim towards.


And if you may not have notice. I have the writing skills of an 8th grader and speak in somewhat of a personal slang. The more you know me, the easier the reading.

Thats about it for today. My first blogger blog and hopefully one that will provide somewhat of an understanding as to who I am.